(MERCHANT, INNKEEPER, PRIEST, and ROBBERS roaming the marketplace)

MERCHANT:

Step right up, get your fruit here! Olives! Figs! Sir! Is that a new garment?

PRIEST:

Hmm?

MERCHANT:

My, you wear it so well.

PRIEST:

Mmhhm.

MERCHANT:

How about some fresh fruit. Huh? Only the best for you.

PRIEST:

Hmm. I’ve seen better.

(ISRAELITE enters)

MERCHANT:

You! What a lovely bag. Why not fill it with the best fruit in all of Jerusalem?

ISRAELITE:

Maybe another time.

MERCHANT:

But another time may never come. Here.

ISRAELITE:

Do excuse me, but I am in a hurry.

MERCHANT:

Oh, everyone’s just go go go. Why not slow down, eh? Enjoy the blessings of our God.

ISRAELITE:

[Irritated] Ma’am.

MERCHANT:

You wouldn’t want to take His blessings for granted, would you?

ISRAELITE:

Well no...

MERCHANT:

Absolutely not. Come. You’ll thank me later.

ISRAELITE:

Just make it quick. I really have a long way to go.

MERCHANT:

What would you like? Apples? Figs?

ISRAELITE:

An apple will do.

MERCHANT:

Just one?

ISRAELITE:

One is fine.

MERCHANT:

Tell you what. Three for the price of two, just for you.

ISRAELITE:

Sure...why not.

MERCHANT:

Let me get you a bag. Where did you say you were going?

ISRAELITE:

Ah, just to Jericho.

MERCHANT:

What’s in Jericho?

ISRAELITE:

Well, heh, it’s actually a funny story. I have a cousin who’s getting married down there, and—

MERCHANT:

Married? You know what makes a great wedding gift?

ISRAELITE:

[Irritated] What?

MERCHANT:

You didn’t get him a gift yet, did you?

ISRAELITE:

Well, no, I was going to say—

MERCHANT:

Oh, what kind of cousin are you? Here, don’t embarrass yourself. Take a bag of olives. They’ll be delighted.

ISRAELITE:

Look, I really need to get going. It’s a long walk to Jericho and I—

(Israelite backs up into LEVITE who falls and drops his basket)

LEVITE:

[Grunts]

ISRAELITE:

Oh my, I’m so sorry! Are you alright?

LEVITE:

I’m okay.

(Israelite helps Levite up)

ISRAELITE:

Are you sure? You look beat.

LEVITE:

I’m just really tired, that’s all.

ISRAELITE:

Here. Let me grab your things.

LEVITE:

[Yawning] Did you say you were going to Jericho?

ISRAELITE:

I did, yes.

LEVITE:

I was heading there myself later today. Would you like to go together?

ISRAELITE:

I wouldn’t mind, really, but I plan to leave now.

LEVITE:

I suggest you wait, so we can go together. It will be safer for the both of us.

ISRAELITE:

What do you mean?

LEVITE:

That’s what I mean. Have you never been to Jericho before?

ISRAELITE:

No. First time actually.

LEVITE:

Really?

ISRAELITE:

Yeah, it’s actually a funny story, my cousin lives down there—

LEVITE:

Don’t be foolish. The road from Jerusalem to Jericho is full of crooks and robbers. You’re best off traveling with a companion.

ISRAELITE:

Oh.

LEVITE:

I’ll be finishing my Levitical duties later today. Let’s meet here in say three hours and head out together?

ISRAELITE:

Sorry sir, but I need to leave now. If I wait any longer—

LEVITE:

Suite yourself.

(Levite exits)

ISRAELITE:

Sorry again...for bumping into you.

MERCHANT:

Olives?

ISRAELITE:

I need to go.

MERCHANT:

Half off. Take it or leave it! You’ll never get this opportunity again—

PRIEST:

[Loudly] Dear God of Israel, hear my humble prayer today!

MERCHANT:

Here we go again...

PRIEST:

I beg you, protect me on my way to Jericho. Keep me from those crooks and robbers and especially those filthy Samaritans. I thank you that I am not a Samaritan, or a thief, or unjust, or even like this merchant who cheats people every day.

MERCHANT:

Pff.

PRIEST:

Amen.

ISRAELITE:

Excuse me sir. Did you say you were going to Jericho?

PRIEST:

Indeed.

ISRAELITE:

I’m actually headed there myself. Would you perhaps—

PRIEST:

Are you now? Then you best stay far away from those no good Samaritans.

ISRAELITE:

Uhh, yeah. I was just going to offer—

PRIEST:

They’re full of nothing but lies. You can never trust them.

ISRAELITE:

Yeah, yeah. I know.

PRIEST:

What do you know? I met a Samaritan once, a filthy creature he was. They’re quite filthy, aren’t they?

ISRAELITE:

They are, yes. Could I—

PRIEST:

You know what I told him?

ISRAELITE:

What?

PRIEST:

Nothing! Hahaha. Did you really think I would even speak to a Samaritan?

ISRAELITE:

No, no, heh. I would never speak to one either.

PRIEST:

Good.

ISRAELITE:

Is it okay if I tag along with you?

PRIEST:

Hmm...yes. I will allow you such a privilege. But no time for chit-chat, I still have my priestly duties to attend to. We’ll meet here in a few hours.

(Priest exits)

ISRAELITE:

But...I’m...never mind.

MERCHANT:

So do we have a deal or not?

ISRAELITE:

Here. Keep the change.

MERCHANT:

Enjoy your travels!

(Israelite exits. Robbers enter)

ROBBER 1:

There. That might work. Come on.

ROBBER 2:

Are you sure? I don’t know, it looks a little small.

ROBBER 1:

Trust me. Get down.

ROBBER 2:

They’ll see me for sure.

ROBBER 1:

If you keep standing they will.

ROBBER 2:

Hey, can we try the net this time?

ROBBER 1:

No, next time.

ROBBER 2:

But you said that last time!

ROBBER 1:

No net.

ROBBER 2:

Why?

ROBBER 1:

We’re not here to mess around, alright.

ROBBER 2:

I’m not messing around. Why do you think those hunters use nets? Because nets catch prey!

ROBBER 1:

We’re not catching rabbits, are we? We’re thieves.

ROBBER 2:

It’s the same idea.

ROBBER 1:

No net.

ROBBER 2:

Ah...I get it. You’re jealous.

ROBBER 1:

Oh, yeah, so jealous.

ROBBER 2:

Yeah. You’re just jealous you didn’t come up with the idea first.

ROBBER 1:

You think I got nothing better to do?

ROBBER 2:

Let me try something new, one time.

ROBBER 1:

And risk getting caught? No thank you.

ROBBER 2:

See. Jealousy.

ROBBER 1:

Where’d you even get that net from anyways?

ROBBER 2:

No one.

ROBBER 1:

Who?

ROBBER 2:

Eh, you wouldn’t know him.

ROBBER 1:

Who?

ROBBER 2:

From uh...

ROBBER 1:

Spit it out.

ROBBER 2:

Uh...Samaritan.

ROBBER 1:

A Samaritan?

ROBBER 1:

Are you out of your mind?!

ROBBER 2:

He seemed like a good guy.

ROBBER 1:

A good guy? There’s no such thing as a good Samaritan.

ROBBER 2:

Ugh, here you go again.

ROBBER 1:

They’re traitors, alright. Sleazy and immoral.

ROBBER 2:

Since when did you care about morality? Look at us, we’re thieves.

ROBBER 1:

But we are not Samaritans.

(Robber 1 grabs the net and throws it aside)

ROBBER 2:

Hey!

ROBBER 1:

I never want to hear about you doing business with a Samaritan again.

ROBBER 2:

I paid good money for that.

(Footsteps. Israelite enters)

ROBBER 1:

Shh! Get down.

(Robbers attack Israelite)

ROBBER 2:

[Heavy breathing]Fast as a rabbit. If only we had a net...

ROBBER 1:

[Heavy breathing] Stop. Just search him.

(Finds money bag)

ROBBER 2:

Jackpot!

ROBBER 1:

Nice. Take the coat and let’s go.

(Robbers exit. Priest enters)

ISRAELITE:

[Groaning]

PRIEST:

Good heavens.

ISRAELITE:

[Weakly] Help...

PRIEST:

Now, it wouldn’t be right for such an important man as myself to waste time on the woes of the rabble.

ISRAELITE:

Please...

PRIEST:

Besides, this is a new garment. I can’t afford to get it stained with your blood. Well, huh huh, I could afford it. But it’s not worth my time. May God bless you, heal you, give you strength, and all that. 

(Priest exits. Levite enters)

LEVITE:

Oh my, what a pity.

ISRAELITE:

Help...help.

LEVITE:

I feel for you, I do. But I’m just so exhausted from my work in the temple. Haven’t I done enough good deeds this week? Someone else will be sure to help you. God bless.

(Levite exits. Samaritan enters and runs up to Israelite)

ISRAELITE:

[Groans]

SAMARITAN:

Easy. Easy. I’ll take care of you.

ISRAELITE:

But, but...

SAMARITAN:

Shhh...don’t worry.

ISRAELITE:

You’re...a...Samaritan.

SAMARITAN:

And you’re bleeding. So let me help you.

ISRAELITE:

But...

(Samaritan take out oil and wine to treat wounds)

SAMARITAN:

This might sting a little.

ISRAELITE:

[Groans]

SAMARITAN:

Just a little more.

ISRAELITE:

Why? Why are you helping me?

(Samaritan binds bandage)

SAMARITAN:

Are you not hurt?

ISRAELITE:

But...I’m a Jew.

SAMARITAN:

Jew, Samaritan, Greek, Roman, what does it matter? Are we not all descendants of Adam?

ISRAELITE:

I don’t understand.

SAMARITAN:

I would bleed just the same as you. It’s only right for me to show mercy. [Pause] There, that should do it for now. Let me help you up.

ISRAELITE:

Th-thank you.

SAMARITAN:

Let’s get you someplace safe. There should be an inn not too far from here.

(Walk to inn, knocks on door)

SAMARITAN:

[Shouting] Innkeeper! Are you there? 

(Knocks once more, Innkeeper opens the door)

INNKEEPER:

Yes?

SAMARITAN:

Do you have a bed for this man?

INNKEEPER:

Oh dear. I’ll see what I can do.

SAMARITAN:

Please, here’s two denarii.

INNKEEPER:

Right away.

SAMARITAN:

Whatever more you spend taking care of him, I’ll repay when I return.

INNKEEPER:

Of course, of course.

SAMARITAN:

Farewell, sir. May God bless your recovery.

(End scene)